Wednesday, January 19, 2011


Stress Management Made Easy

Another Patton Associates S-M-A-R-TBriefing

 "Dis-Stress Control Made Easy"

by: Gary F. Patton (gfp '42™)1     

Do you find yourself worrying? Facing a serious challenge? Or struggling with a person or situation that's causing you to feel 'stressed'. If so, here is good news for you ...
"Any thought that contains love has a calming effect." ~ Hugh Prather (1938- ) U.S. author & counselor  
Next time you're stressed, try a simple approach I call my "Distress Controller™".  When you do, you immediately will lessen or defeat the negative effects of the "flight or fight" response2 
3 triggered by excessive dis-stress ...the bad kind of 'stress'. 

At the same time, you will automatically and quickly produce the healthful "relaxation response"4 in your body.
"'Dis-stress' is deadly for professionals and the level of your 'stress' requires constant optimization!" ~ gfp '42™
When you do, you will better regulate your thinking and, thereby, your emotional response to whatever is happening in your life at the moment. You'll also prevent your strengths from becoming liabilities, which dis-stress does to us all, as you'll discover here.

In other words, you will "optimize your stress" using this simple process:

  1. Sitting or lying down and closing your eyes, if possible. (It still works when you can't!)
  2. Check all the major muscle groups in your body and allow them to relax.
  3. Focusing on your heart (Touching your chest near there, when appropriate, is subtle. It is doable even with others around. You'll focus easier on your heart by doing this.) 
  4. Taking a deep breath and hold it for about 3 seconds.
  5. Exhaling slowly.
  6. Reflecting on a personal, heart-regulating issue. (How do I do that, you ask? While doing #3 and 4 a few times, ask yourself what would be a more effective and efficient emotion or attitude than you're currently experiencing that will not only be better for you but also for those around you. Try appreciation. Or compassion. Or love! If the feeling doesn't come, just hold your heart-focus5 and stay neutral. When the feeling does arrive, reflect on the encouragement that floods you at your centre, quietly for a few more seconds, while continuing to breathe deeply as above.) 
  7. Do not worry about whether you're doing the above 'right' or try to force things. Remain neutral and let relaxation occur naturally it will when you regularly practise the Distress Controller™.

The above is a great, first step toward more effective and ongoing self care. That's one outcome you can be really happy about!

Here’s your people-relationship and life-skills S-M-A-R-TTip™: 
"Dis-stress control & stress optimization using my Distress Controller™ are moment-to-moment essentials for professionals who wish to flourish & survive because you cannot manage stress!" ~ gfp '42™
When you smooth your heart-brain interaction6, you feel better and can be at your best. You are better equipped to think more clearly because you can see people and situations from a broader, more complete perspective.

When you smooth your heart-brain interaction, you also become a better decision-maker and
problem-solver. (Hopefully, increased wisdom would be a benefit for you!)

Please remember also, quality customer/people relationships are a moment-to-moment choice, each time. And a full life is an unending series of wise decisions. Try my Distress Controller™ ...right now... please! You'll believe in its power when you sense how it makes you feel.

You've got nothing to lose. And everything to gain. 

Please call me at the number below if I can help you in this area further! It's a coaching specialty for me because of what I learned from surviving a near-death experience and spending about 5 years being unable to work.7 

OK, scroll back up and work through the steps!

Please also drop me a line using the link immediately below this paragraph. I'd love to hear what you think and how you feel about the above.

By clicking here, you can e-mail me regarding questions about this article, to request other stress management information or to be added to my S-M-A-R-TBriefing™ Mailing List.

With my compliments and permission to reproduce, without change or profiteering, including the following:

© Copyright 1987-2010  Gary F. Patton, People Development Coaches

"I specialize in business & personal life coaching that helps professionals flourish by relating and serving better cross-culturally & cross-generationally!"

142-26 Livingston Rd. Toronto ON CAN  M1E 4S4   Tel: 416-931-7048   E-Mail:
View my Visual Resume     Discover places where we can connect

This article is published under a Creative Commons 3.0 License.

Tags: anger, angry people, alcoholics, anxiety, appreciation, attraction principles, brain, breathing, caring, challenges, choices, clarity, creativity, client service, customer service, depressed, depressives, difficult people, distress, distress control, drunks, emotions, emotional response, fear, fight or flight, fight or flight mechanism, fret, fretting, gifts, heart, heart-felt, health, healthy, liabilities, love, organization, patient service, patron service, perspective, personal growth, personal problems, planning, problems, problem solving, project management, procrastination, relax, relaxation, relaxation response, self-help, spiritual gifts, strengths, stress, stress management, struggling, swearing, Tai Chi, thinking, time, time management, worry, worrying,


1     By allowing your cursor to rest for a moment on any of my hyper-links, a Pop-up Window will share additional information about the Web Site you can choose to visit by left-clicking it. You will discover this is helpful. e.g. gfp'42™ = "Gary's copyright & trademark designation + his Web site for more FREE S-M-A-R-TTips™"

2     In a typical stress response, certain glands in your head increases the production of high-powered chemicals to engage the "flight-or-fight" response.
    This internal mechanism is a complex of bodily interactions. It triggers automatically in you because its purpose is to maximize the changes of your survival via an increased heart rate & blood flow, cooling sweating & many other dis-stress reactions that we all have daily.
    By doing so, the dis-stress response enhances our body's ability to react to a real, or perceived, threat that you are experiencing.
    And it's the perceived or virtual dis-stressors that are the really dangerous ones for our health & performance i.e. an angry co-worker, friend or spouse, a financial problem, a sick child.
    This is because these stressors can remain at a high level for a long time without our bodies having a chance to relax.
    This results in all kinds of diseases including "Chronic Fatigue & Immune Deficiency Syndrome (CFIDS)". The latter kept me unable to work for about five years. You can read here  & at
about how I was healed by an easy change & very quickly ...once I learned how.

3     For example, if you’re being chased by an angry dog and you knock your knee, the "fight or flight response" temporarily will prevent your knee from becoming inflamed.     This way, you'll not be slowed down and you'll not be bitten by the dog.
    At the same time your body is shutting down a lot of other systems because its main priority is survival.
    In our modern, high stress     lifestyles, the "flight or fight" mechanism can become almost permanently engaged in some of us. This creates all kinds of problems like headaches, sore shoulder muscles and worse ailments depending on how long you ignore your body's cry for relief.

4          "The relaxation response is a physical state of deep rest that changes the physical and emotional responses to [dis-]stress... and the opposite of the fight or flight response." ~ Dr. Herbert Benson, M.D., U.S. author & Associate Professor of Medicine Harvard Medical School  (Discover his classic book, "The Relaxation Response" at )

5     You'll discover the benefits of heart focus and appreciation plus their positive impact on your body, emotions, mind, spirit & will in this short video here at .

6     You'll discover the benefits of hear-brain interaction and  its positive impact on your body, emotions, mind,  spirit & will in this short video here at .

7     You'll discover a helpful, short article on the benefits of having a mentor to help you deal with the powerful emotions that often drive our dis-stress at .

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